10.12.2009

mondays are my least favorite

but it was a productive day: boys bedding changed, their room picked up (x10), a good long phone conversation w/ a bestie, 3 loads of laundry folded and put away, linen closet organized (again), towel drawer in kitchen organized, 3 more loads of laundry washed, two bathrooms cleaned, dishwasher unloaded, reloaded, big dishes washed, games played w/ boys, ninja-moves demonstration watched, homework done.

i like having monday as my workday because it makes the rest of my week a little easier (and cleaner) but it's also the reason monday is my least favorite day of the week. and the reason cooking on monday night is a challenge. the last thing i want to do is make a big mess that will have to be cleaned up (okay so a lot of nights feel like this but i usually do it anyway).

but tonight called for in-n-out. except that on our way to in-n-out we saw denny's. well micah saw denny's and we all agreed on that instead. because when is that last time we've eaten at denny's? and you can get breakfast for dinner!

so there we were. micah and i and three wild banshees seated in our booth. and the first set of silverware fell under the table. then a second and a third. and you know what it's like having a 2 year old out to eat. they want to sit by dad, no mom, no the high chair, not the high chair, so they have to go out w/ dad, now they're back and he wants the salt, to taste the salt, then the waiter shows up but the two year old steps on a big brother's finger so he's back in the high chair whether he likes it or not. but he doesn't like it so he's crying....and there's the waiter. still waiting. ever so patiently (thankfully). and i know that all 3 sets of eyes in the restaurant are on us: that family at the back of the restaurant.

then the 4 year old has to go potty so i take them all for a little diversion, flashing a quick smile as i pass the other 3 patrons. when i return, we have the place to ourselves (not surprising). micah asked if the man talked to me on his way out. i said, "no. why?" and micah said, "because he talked to me." this sweet older man came over not to impart his words of wisdom, not to criticize but to express a job well done for our diligence. for not dismissing or ignoring the misbehavior but trying to correct and teach. micah responded by saying it didn't feel very productive. the man assured him that there are rough nights but sticking w/ it is what matters. he left by saying we just needed to hear that tonight. and boy was he right! how nice it felt to hear a heartfelt expression of confidence rather than feeling a silent harsh judgment. i love that man and want to remember to be like him!

this incident reminded me of Elder Bednars talk from general conference. here are some excerpts:
....Sometimes Sister Bednar and I wondered if our efforts to do these spiritually essential things were worthwhile. Now and then verses of scripture were read amid outbursts such as “He’s touching me!” “Make him stop looking at me!” “Mom, he’s breathing my air!” Sincere prayers occasionally were interrupted with giggling and poking. And with active, rambunctious boys, family home evening lessons did not always produce high levels of edification. At times Sister Bednar and I were exasperated because the righteous habits we worked so hard to foster did not seem to yield immediately the spiritual results we wanted and expected.
....Sister Bednar and I thought helping our sons understand the content of a particular lesson or a specific scripture was the ultimate outcome. But such a result does not occur each time we study or pray or learn together. The consistency of our intent and work was perhaps the greatest lesson—a lesson we did not fully appreciate at the time.
....Each family prayer, each episode of family scripture study, and each family home evening is a brushstroke on the canvas of our souls. No one event may appear to be very impressive or memorable. But just as the yellow and gold and brown strokes of paint complement each other and produce an impressive masterpiece, so our consistency in doing seemingly small things can lead to significant spiritual results. “Wherefore, be not weary in well-doing, for ye are laying the foundation of a great work. And out of small things proceedeth that which is great” (D&C 64:33). Consistency is a key principle as we lay the foundation of a great work in our individual lives and as we become more diligent and concerned in our own homes.
i love elder bednar, too! and i also want to remember that sometimes you can see productivity like on mondays and it looks great. but a lot of times you can't see it and it's still there. that's really important and i must remember that especially!

11 comments:

Shoecrazy Sue said...

LOVED that talk! It was a total Aha moment, and put things into perspective. 1 brushstroke at a time! Missing you guys terribly!

Stephanie said...

Elder Bednar's talk was great. It made me think of us, alot! Your Denny's story was great and that was nice of that man to say that to Micah. Hopefully many of us will be that way when our kids our older and have their own families. It's never good to have the feeling that everyone around you is silently criticizing you and I'm sure we all do it. I love the picture of you guys at the top of your blog!!

Amanda said...

I was laughing the whole time reading your Denny's experience - we took the kids out to dinner Saturday night and it was crazy. In the car on the way home Jonny said, "Well, that was hellacious!" Your story sounded all too familiar...

Amy said...

That is so nice to have a positive stranger interaction. I wish my monday was like your monday! I blogged about that talk too. It is so important to remember. Glad you are doing well!

melissa said...

Yes, yes, and yes on all accounts. Loved Elder Bednar's talk (at least what I could hear of it ;). It is so necessary to have confirmation that the efforts we are putting forth to teach our children will pay off- it DOES make a difference (although most of the time I don't see it in my own children!!). Those are sweet little moments to hold onto. I needed this reminder/perspective- thanks for sharing!

Mandee said...

I must have been changing a poopy diaper during that talk, because I don't remember those words ... so thank you for sharing.

You are a good wife to agree to Dennys. But it sounds like you were in the right place at the right time.

Alycat said...

Love the Denny's story!!
We took the kids to Fresh Choice last week & it was AWFUL!!! I need to remind myself not to take the kids to a restaurant until they are older. Claire threw up all over the place at our table & then she went wild running around the restaurant in her smelly clothes. Not fun!!! I basically had one plate of salad & when we left Cory said "Well that was a waste of $30.00!!"
Miss you guys so much!!

Phoebe said...

Your Monday sounds a bit like mine!

Loved Bednar's talk. Just what we all needed to hear!

Unknown said...

Just add 12 hours of work starting at 7pm and thats my Monday too!!!! I really should try to split it up, I just can't.

kiddle97 said...

This is why I love you Cheryl! Thanks for sharing this. Bless that dear old man.

Heather Kearns said...

hi, i can't believe how many comments you get, you should probably publish some of your thoughts! you have quite the captive audience. i would love to talk sometime, i will try calling soon.

“I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.”

thanks nicole.